A fellow named Wizard wrote a comment on one of my fuck buddy posts here. I started to write a long winded comment, but decided to blog about it instead because I got really fired up. I’m risking losing a reader, but screw it, we don’t pull punches around this blog. Wizard, you’re going to get roughed up a bit, but suck it up big boy because you’ve got it coming.

Here’s what Wizard wrote:

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As you may or may not know, I do a fair amount of bitching about online dating, especially Match.com. Match has got it’s place and I know it’s great for a lot of people, but I kinda have a love-hate relationship with it. Maybe a little more on the hate side. I prefer to meet women in the field and in the last two years I’ve met far more quality women the old fashioned way than via online.

(OMG I love to laugh!)

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Hey, everyone!  Sorry I’ve been incommunicado for the last week or so.  Life’s been crazy busy, as it all too often is. Here’s a little taste of what I’ve been up to.

Update on My Happiness

I’ve been doing a lot better as far as my personal independence since my Philosophy of Happiness post.  I’ve gone out again with my sorority alum club and been to the gym almost every day.  Also, in a recent conversation, the BF admitted that he’d been at fault, too.  He’s really still in a lot of debt from grad school because his field doesn’t offer funding to grad students, and he also didn’t do a great job budgeting so there’s a credit card debt factor.  As a result, he can’t afford to do a lot of the things he considers fun, and he admitted that he’s been taking out the frustration about the results of his poor financial planning on me.  But I do have some news that is not only great for me, but which will also alleviate both our financial situations. Read the full article

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In this post on his blog, Evan Marc Katz asked his readers to rank themselves in four categories: Looks, Personality, Intelligence, and Career.  Both Lance and I couldn’t resist commenting, and Lance also blogged an excellent reaction here.  It is pretty evident from the comments to his blog as well as the original article on the Freakonomics bulletin here that most people have a tendency to seriously overestimate themselves.  EMK hypothesizes,

The good news is that having a combination of self-esteem and self-delusion seems to be exactly what allows us to function. How would we feel if we didn’t believe we’re above average in every single way?

Although that is insightful and seems at least partially true, I also can’t help but feel that there must be a little more to it.  In a comment on Lance’s blog about whether you can teach an old dog new tricks, I mention something that I always told my students:

People are inherently lazy. Therefore, to convince them to take action, you must convince them not that your position is morally superior, but that they have more to lose by doing nothing than they do by taking action.

The fabulous cheekie suggested that I write a post where I expand on that idea, so here we go.  Read the full article

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Again a bit late with the Weekly but it’s all good my peeps. I was sucking down tequila shots on Friday night and that basically shot me for the rest of the weekend. What else? I’ve been talking online with a nice MILF who is a video game geek, my LDFB is coming down to visit in August, and generally I’ve been enjoying my summer. What, you expected me to invent cold fusion over here?

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(Watch the video above then read me)

My homeboy Evan Marc Katz wrote an interesting post where he ranks himself in the following categories: Looks, Intelligence, Personality, Career.

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Watch this immediately. Then watch the other videos.

Converse has a viral marketing campaign going on featuring a hot chick, and I kinda think it’s hilarious. Notice the excellent satire on the looks vs. social value thing. If you can wade through the BS, Jennifer actually gives some good advice.

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I really dug Honey’s post, When is Enough, Enough, because she touched on a number of points that are relevant to my life. Really, they’re relevant to all daters and LTR folks out there. Here are three points:

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I recently received an e-mail from a fellow who saw my post on The Seduction Bible.  He wanted some advice regarding his ex-girlfriend, who he’d been seeing for almost a year.  Out of respect for his privacy I won’t reveal the details, but the relationship seemed pretty full of drama and, although they’re broken up now, they are still blurring that line between friends, friends-with-benefits, and romantic partners. The thing that struck me about his e-mail was that he said several times that he’s always “in it till the end,” and that if he feels there is even the smallest chance of saving a relationship then he will keep trying.

This, of course, raises the question: when is enough, enough?  How do you know when it’s “the end”?  How do you know when “the smallest chance” for saving a relationship has passed?  Read the full article

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Tags: attraction, breakups, change, drama, emotional investment, happiness, justification, wasting time